God Doesn’t Have Grandkids
And let there be light . . . It was early. So early that the pitch black of night hadn’t get been pierced by the sun. Yet my room was illuminated in the brilliance of light from the overhead bulb because Grandpa had just flipped it on.
It was early as I said… because we were going fishing. I was 9 years old and living with Grandparents on their sprawling farm in bayou country Louisiana. Whilst I had already lived almost a decade prior, much of what made my world ‘a life’ started on their farm. It was there that I finally went to school without fail, was clothed without holes, slept in uninterrupted safety, and was fed without ever again knowing the pangs of hunger.
And I learned to fish. It was of no surprise that I became my Grandpa’s shadow being the tomboy out of the grandkids. What he knew, I wanted to know. What he did, I wanted to do. How he was, was how I wanted to be. Because He . . . was the greatest person I’d had ever met (up to that point). There were many lessons from farming, shoveling drainage ditches and pitching hay for the horse vet neighbor; but it was the fishing that became my favorite. Even with the blasting burn of that bulb on the ceiling cutting thru the slit of my eyes as they struggled to open without my eyeballs burning up. When darkness is ‘that dark’, it seemed reasonable to imagine going blind by how bright the light was.
This beloved memory of early pre-dawn mornings to go fishing with Grandpa always comes to mind when I find myself in an emotion of worry about either of my sons.
See . . . I find myself remembering those crisp dark cold mornings packing and loading up Grandpa’s boat, collecting fishing rods and reels and setting off ‘down the bayou’ because it is Grandpa that I most associate with what it means to rely on God. Grandpa, the only adult I vividly remember sitting quietly with his bible open, reading it. It was Grandpa that could bring me to welcome early mornings without complaint. Because we were going fishing and that always included talking about God while out on the water anchored somewhere, casting away our lines. Fishing with Grandpa was my favorite because it really meant: fishing and talking about God with Grandpa.
So, when I forget and find myself drifting into worry over my life or my son’s lives, it is memories of my Grandpa that align me back and rely on God. When I even slightly venture into the “what do I do now?” frame of mind . . . Well, Grandpa would say: You deal with it and never quit. My Grandpa did nickname me ‘Tank’ after all. So, I buckle up and look UP. And I look to God. Because that is what Grandpa did.
Now, this is especially vital as my sons go off and out into this terribly scary World without the security of my watchful parental eye to see them thru. Relying on God during moments when I feel the despair and powerlessness of parenthood is critical. How on Earth does any parent ever get thru this????!!!?
Well, gratefully, someone (not Grandpa) long ago said this “God doesn’t have grandkids” phrase to me and it hit home in a way other wise quotes or idioms had never quite worked. While it wasn’t Grandpa that said it to me, it is a quote that I relate to how he was with us grandkids. Because, Grandpa was one of a very short list of humans that exemplified what it meant to be Christ-Like. What it could possibly mean to be told: God loves you. The World and it’s cast of madmen can often try to chip away at my faith, but remembering Grandpa’s example of what it was to be a man of God can dispel that in an instant.
So, it is “God’s job to worry about my kids”. Better said than done, sure, but still truth. It must be that way for me because, otherwise, my heart would never stop feeling crushed under the weight of my worries and I’d probably never get any sleep from the endless infinite thoughts of possible horrors finding their way to my sons’ lives.
There’s a lifelong journey ahead for my sons and it is God that is steering their way. Gods got them! And I must step aside and let Him do the worrying; let Him be their Father. I am their Mother, sure, but they are HIS children. What I may be capable of doing pales in comparison to His glory.
In Ephesians 1.4 St Paul explains this to us. He says, “God chose us before the world began, to be holy and blameless in His sight, to be full of love”. St Paul adds, “through Jesus we are to be His children”.
God does not want us to be His grandchildren. God does not want us to believe because we have heard from others who God is. Since He found us, loves us, chose us, He wants us to follow Him because we ourselves know who He is. Because we are chosen by God, we are asked to tell others about Him, not to lose faith or confidence in Him or in this troubled world. Because God gives us His love, power, grace, forgiveness, peace, and joy to make the world better. - Bishop Peter Stasiuk C.Ss.R. AM
